Emotion Dsyregulation
There are many different reasons why we may have difficulty regulating our emotions: genetic factors, our temperament, the environment we grew up in, trauma; just to name a few. In fact, we might not even have a good sense of what an emotion even is, or when we are even experiencing them! Sometimes it can just feel like a storm inside of us: a jumble or sensations, thoughts, and urges. Or maybe it’s like we are drowning in a wave of feelings and we just can’t seem to get our head above the water to be able to think clearly. Sometimes, when we are overtaken by our emotions, we can lose control over our behaviours, and end up doing or saying things that we later regret. At it’s extreme, we may try to harm ourselves or others, or maybe consider suicide. If our struggles with regulating emotions are persistent and chronic, or perhaps very intense in any given moment, we have may difficulties in our relationships, parenting, at school or work, and with our sense of self-worth and self-identity. Please know that you are not alone in this experience, and you do not have to diagnosed with something called ‘Borderline Personality Disorder’ to struggle with regulating emotion. There are many effective, evidence-based therapies and strategies available to compassionately support and treat individuals struggling with emotion regulation. Please reach out to me for more information on this issue, and if you would like to be assessed for emotion dsyregulation and/or Borderline Personality Disorder.
AddictioN and Substance misuse
There remains a significant amount of stigma and misunderstanding in our society around addiction, which, unfortunately, only makes it harder for people to reach out to get help. Yet the reality is that every year, 1 in 5 Canadians will struggle with a mental health or addiction issue. In my extensive clinical experience, addiction and mental health concerns tend to go hand in hand; it’s very unlikely that one is present without the other. For this reason, I prefer to work on these issues with clients concurrently, in other words, we not only look at problematic substance or alcohol use and behaviours, but also your mental health concerns and symptoms (e.g. mood, anxiety, depression, emotion dsyregulation). Often times, when our mental health improves and we adopt healthier coping strategies, our substance use will start to reduce. I work with clients on substance use concerns from a non-judgemental, harm reduction approach, vs an abstinence-only model (that doesn’t mean I’m against abstinence, however!). Depending on our assessment, your needs and goals, we will develop a plan together to get you walking on your preferred path with regards to your substance use and mental health concerns.
Trauma
Many of us have experienced, witnessed, or have been told traumatic events such as: natural disasters, violence, abuse, unexpected death/illness and accidents. For some of us, however, these events stay with us for a long-time after they happen, in our body, and in our mind. We might be riddled with anxiety and panic, have difficulties leaving the house and going to school or work, have poor sleep and nightmares, feel moody and irritable, and perhaps be plagued by thoughts, images, and sensations from the event as if we are re-living it over and over again. We might lose track of time, or feel disconnected from our body, or our identity entirely. To add fuel to the fire, we may even blame ourselves for struggling, or for the event even happening. It is important to know that you are not at fault for struggling with these concerns, and that you deserve the opportunity to meet with a trained mental health professional to share your story and get support and treatment. Please reach out.
OVER-CONTROL
In today’s society, having control over our emotions and behaviours is often coveted, valued, and reinforced through social media, but it is also possible to have ‘too much’ of a good thing. We may end up striving for perfection and order in every aspect of our lives, and in ways that are not sustainable and can damage important relationships. We might find ourselves obsessing over small details often, and ‘not seeing the forest for the trees’. We may struggle significantly with plans changing, letting go of past hurts and sometimes objects or things that are no longer necessary. We may feel like things, outcomes, other people, and even ourselves are ‘never good enough’, and we may have a constant feeling of stress, tension, anxiety and depression. Finally, we might feel alone, and be described as distant and aloof by others, though deep down we might actually be longing for connection. If some of these concerns are a struggle for you, I would love to support you in finding a balance that may better serve you, and I am trained in evidence-based strategies to support individuals diagnosed with over-control disorders and concerns.
